After being here for more than a week, I have done a lot of things like- ...
Okay, I admit. All I did was slack off. I can't believe I could sleep for 12 hours! D: I didn't think that my first semester in med school was THAT hard, but I think it really exhaust my brain, but seriously guys, during that cruel 4 months I only have to memorize a few thin books while for the upcoming semesters I have to memorize like... lots of huge thick books that's almost as thick as 4 Macbooks stacked together! Maybe the next time I came home I'll sleep for 24 hours each day huh? God, please give me your guidance too for the upcoming semesters...
So, a few days ago I had THE TALK with my mom. We were in the car, coming home from an afternoon jogging at a park in the city. We talked about lots of stuff like life, my family's financial condition *thank God it was okay, especially after I got admitted at university for a normal price :')*, and in the end we reached to a point where we have to talk about 'this'. Yeah, my future. I asked mom what kind of doctor should I be. She said that I can be anything I want, as long as it's beneficial for me and the world around me. Deep down inside, I wanted to be a pediatrician, while I know what she meant was being an obstetrician. So I said to her, what if I wanted to be a pediatrician? She said that it's cool, but I should spend more time to think, after all I still have a long way ahead. I need to focus on my studies and so on. I had advantages to take a specialty that requires a longer period of studying because of my young age, but I have wanted to become a pediatrician since a looooooong time ago, since I was in elementary school. Yet, this talk made me think twice about it. I still have a long way to go.
I don't know what hit me at that time but suddenly I came up with the most interesting yet uninteresting topic in the world. Partner. Spouse. Husband. Something like that. So I asked my mom, what kind of person should I marry in the future? My mom then shot a weird glance on me and asked:
"So you actually thought about that kind of stuff? Finally you have reached that phase, eh?"
Well, I won't be around for too much so I think we really need to talk about this, well just in case. My parents have always been the protective-yet-free kind of parents. It's a little bit hard to explain. They gave me freedom to do anything but I'm responsible for all the after effects, but being the only daughter made my parents very, very protective to me. Not overprotective, but yeah, VERY protective. Having to carry such a huge responsibility and all the burdens upon my shoulders made me a little bit more mature than kids my age- which made me normal. After all, what could you expect form a soon-to-be-16 years old girl being in university with her 17-20 years old friends? That pretty much made me blend with all the big kids- I mean young adults around me while other kids my age are busy planing for their sweet 16 parties. This is why my mother decided that she would not interfere with my choice. She said that any kind of guy would be okay, as long as you're sure that he's the one.
THAT'S EXACTLY MY PROBLEM MOM. How would you know that he's the one? She said that one day I'll understand. I'll notice that the feeling is different. I will find out one day in the future. She also noted that I should consider my future in laws and have the 'chore, financial, kids, and all other important grown up stuff' talk with my future spouse. Then I giggled. I'm only sixteen, marriage is like... 10 years ahead from now. I need to finish university, be a pediatrician *amen* and find a job first before getting married! I don't wanna be some kind of douche who burdens his/her parents with marriage expenses and live-at-my-parents-house-forever-because-I'm-too-lazy-to-find-a-job. I sighed, yeah it's still a looooong way ahead.
That night I closed my eyes and imagined how my life would be after I got married. My mind drifted away and suddenly I'm at an unfamiliar house, talking to my daughter who was eating breakfast. I was in my white coat and was just about to go to the hospital, then suddenly a guy appeared in a similar white coat. His face was blurred, just as blurred as the image of my future husband that I had in mind. His voice was deep yet calm and soft. They're like music to my ears. He's like the exact kind of husband that I would love to marry in the future. Then it strikes me, who is the lucky-or unlucky guy ? What if he's someone that I've already known, but who?! Suddenly, 'his' image came across my mind. I tried to think about another guy, but it's just impossible.
But really? Is it really him? All I can do right now is hope and until now, I can't help but smile at the thought of marrying a doctor and have a doctor x doctor relationship. Isn't it sweet to walk hand-in-hand at the hospital hallway? Despite having only a little time to meet, we're still close and other craps like that? I love those craps <3
FYI, who is this... 'him'?
Well he's ... *drum rolls*
dr. Derek Stiles! <3
OMG who wouldn't love a surgeon like him? *squeals*
. . . *is shot
I was joking, btw. 'Him' is 'him'. He's a guy that only I know who *until now*. Don't worry, we'll send you our marriage invitation lol.
<3
<3
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