A Letter to My Future Husband

Jakarta, February 24th 2012

Dear my future husband,

How are you today? Did everything turn out great at work? I really hope so. Just in case you're wondering, I'm fine. Really. I'm just a little bit tired from reading hundreds of pages of notes about cells, cells, cells. Well, as you can see I'm still in my first year of medical school, yeah long before we got together.

Honey, sometimes I wonder if you even exist in this cruel world. I can't seem to find you no matter how hard I try- Well, I haven't even tried anyway. I'm just not interested-or just simply afraid to hurt someone else after all I've ever done. I hurt lots of people. I broke their heart. I made them cry. Why? I don't even know. Is this God's way to show me that 'they' are not you? I surely hope so.

Sometimes I do wonder what would happen if I couldn't find you. Would I be lonely? Would I spent my whole life alone in a dark place? Or will I be happier? I'm not sure, well up to this point anyway. Honey, all I ever want is to find my ultimate happiness, and now that you're by my side reading this letter, you should finally understand that I have found it within you.

Please take good care of the future me, no matter how short-tempered I am, no matter how talkative I am, no matter how eccentric I could be at certain times, remember that behind all those flaws stands a girl- wait, a woman :p- who wants to cook for you everyday, to take her children to school with you, to hold hands with you, to shower you with love, to hug you every time you come back from work no matter how tired she is after a long day at work dealing with patients. Please, do not break my-future-self's heart. Please do not break the promises you have made with my parents when you came to propose me. Please do not let the ring I have on the my left ring finger slip off after all those things we've been through.

Well, just between you and me, up until the time I wrote this letter I've always imagined you to be a doctor, but what are you exactly? Only the future me would know. I'm not even sure you existed up until now, yet I really wish that you do. I sometimes imagine both of us walking together side-by-side, holding hands, wearing white jackets and just have a little chat in the hallway, yeah small things like that, but for me that keeps me close to my medical books. Despite that, I don't give a damn of what you do right now, as long as its legal, you're honest, you're doing your best, you treat me and our kids well, I think it's enough dear. Thank you for all the awesome things you have done/will do for me.

Love,

Your wife in 2012 :)

16

The day I turned sixteen was the day I laughed the most and cried the hardest in my life :')

Happy birthday :)

My Last Day as A Fifteen y.o. Girl

Tomorrow, a year older a year wiser. Another step to adultery. Another step away from the joy of being a kid.

And another day goes by without you. It wouldn't be a 'sweet' sixteen without you. I wish you could be here with me. To hug me and shower me with your love. I miss you both.

Fairytales DO Exist!

Today I attended a lecture given by doctor whom-shall-not-be-named. No, I was just joking, let's just call him Dr. D. I don't know how many times he had told this to his students, but upon listening to his stories I- well the whole class- just couldn't stop giggling, blushing, and laughing. Well when he told us a little bit of himself, he included a sweet little story of how I met your mother- Nope, it's actually a story of how he met his daughters' mother.

He first met her when they were in elementary school, which is 1952. Both of them were classmates until they decided to go to different junior high schools. They were not dating back then, but they met again when they attended university in August 1964. They studied at the Faculty of Medicine University of Indonesia, yeah our beloved university. They got closed and closer until THEY GOT TOGETHER AT 1PM THE NOVEMBER 30th 1964. He also told us where it happened. How did he manage to remember the exact time and place?! Nobody knew. Then he told us that they got married after 9 years of dating aaaaand now they have 2 daughters and 3 grandchildren.

What did I do? All I did was laugh and felt envious. I didn't know that my dreams could become reality- at least for someone else. Though it's just a bit I wish that the same thing could happen to me. One day, perhaps. Thinking of you wherever you are <3

I miss reading Kingdom Hearts fanfictions ._____.

Valentine's Day - 1 = FIRST DAY OF 2ND SEMESTER

Tomorrow's Valentines Day- yaaaaaaaaaaay- wait for me it's just an ordinary Tuesday. Seriously guys, what's so special? It's just February 14th. Flowers, chocolates, candies, teddy bears, love poems, valentine's day cards, cupcakes, more chocolates, more, and more, and MORE chocolate. Yeah, it's special .____.

Seriously guys, do you have to wait 'till valentine's day to treat your girls better? Girls, do you need to wait for February 14th to make chocolates and shower your cherished ones with love? I don't think that's the real meaning of love. Maybe that's what makes Valentine's Day so special? I don't know and that is why I don't think I will celebrate Valentine's Day until I found that special someone, so guess what? I won't make/buy any chocolate for Valentine's Day. Yay~ But I'll accept anything you give to me. Sweets are most preferable. *shot *Y-U-NO-JUST-ADMIT-THAT-YOU-ONLY-WANT-THE-SWEETS* H-Hahahaha what are you talking about, inner voice inside my brain?.

Anyway, today marks my first day of the second semester! OMG OMG SO EXCITED *shot

Cell, cell, cell. That's the only thing that I can think of right now. Today turned out to be such an awesome yet such a hectic day. Surrounded by friends, friends, and more friends- and no family :'

God I miss mom and dad soooo much. I was crying a river when I had to leave Bali, my comfy bed, my beloved stuffed toys, my room, my sofa, my shoes, my dresses, and my SHORTS for the sake of a better future :')

Gotta finish my report now! D: ciao!

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