Dear my future husband,
How are you today? Did everything turn out great at work? I really hope so. Just in case you're wondering, I'm fine. Really. I'm just a little bit tired from reading hundreds of pages of notes about cells, cells, cells. Well, as you can see I'm still in my first year of medical school, yeah long before we got together.
Honey, sometimes I wonder if you even exist in this cruel world. I can't seem to find you no matter how hard I try- Well, I haven't even tried anyway. I'm just not interested-or just simply afraid to hurt someone else after all I've ever done. I hurt lots of people. I broke their heart. I made them cry. Why? I don't even know. Is this God's way to show me that 'they' are not you? I surely hope so.
Sometimes I do wonder what would happen if I couldn't find you. Would I be lonely? Would I spent my whole life alone in a dark place? Or will I be happier? I'm not sure, well up to this point anyway. Honey, all I ever want is to find my ultimate happiness, and now that you're by my side reading this letter, you should finally understand that I have found it within you.
Please take good care of the future me, no matter how short-tempered I am, no matter how talkative I am, no matter how eccentric I could be at certain times, remember that behind all those flaws stands a girl- wait, a woman :p- who wants to cook for you everyday, to take her children to school with you, to hold hands with you, to shower you with love, to hug you every time you come back from work no matter how tired she is after a long day at work dealing with patients. Please, do not break my-future-self's heart. Please do not break the promises you have made with my parents when you came to propose me. Please do not let the ring I have on the my left ring finger slip off after all those things we've been through.
Well, just between you and me, up until the time I wrote this letter I've always imagined you to be a doctor, but what are you exactly? Only the future me would know. I'm not even sure you existed up until now, yet I really wish that you do. I sometimes imagine both of us walking together side-by-side, holding hands, wearing white jackets and just have a little chat in the hallway, yeah small things like that, but for me that keeps me close to my medical books. Despite that, I don't give a damn of what you do right now, as long as its legal, you're honest, you're doing your best, you treat me and our kids well, I think it's enough dear. Thank you for all the awesome things you have done/will do for me.
Love,
Your wife in 2012 :)
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